Shay recalled how Sandoval was “there for me in a time when no one else was” in a preview of next week’s episode of ‘Vanderpump Rules’

Scheana Shay and Tom Sandoval arrive to the 2018 E! People’s Choice Awards held at the Barker Hangar on Nov. 11, 2018. Photo:Charley Gallay/E! Entertainment/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty

Scheana Shay is stuck between a rock and a hard place.

In a preview of next week’s episode of Vanderpump Rules, the “Good as Gold” singer, 38, admits that she is struggling to cut Tom Sandoval out of her life following his affair with Rachel “Raquel” Leviss, which ended his nine-year relationship with Ariana Madix.

Scheana tells Lala Kent that she is “not welcoming him back into this group with open arms” and knows she “can’t ever be friends” with Sandoval again.

However, the Bravo star is having mixed emotions about leaving the Schwartz & Sandy’s co-owner in the dust after he gave her money when she was at her lowest point.

“That’s where I’m struggling,” she tells her friend. “That’s what I was telling Ariana. I’m like Ariana, ‘Do you remember in the pandemic when I had no income and I woke up one day to a massive PayPal from Sandoval?’ Because I had no money and I had nothing coming in.”

Scheana further explains how Sandoval came to her rescue in a confessional, saying, “During the pandemic, I woke up to several thousand dollars in my account. He knew I was struggling at the time. My podcast got canceled. I’m pregnant. I had no income and he was there for me in a time when no one else was.”

The reality star reiterates that she was “not saying I’m going to be his best friend again. I’m not saying come over for f—ing dinner, let me paint your toenails white.”

“I’m struggling not forgiving this human who has been there for me,” she adds as she holds back tears.

When Lala asks if she was feeling “torn” about picking a side between Ariana and Sandoval, she clarifies, “I’m not feeling torn, that’s the thing. I’m team Ariana ‘til I die.”

During an episode of Bravo’s Hot Mic podcast in December, Scheana spoke about the “inner struggle” she faced as she and her castmates came back together to film Vanderpump Rules after the scandal.

“It is an ensemble cast. It’s not just Tom and Ariana,” she said, referring to the spotlight that’s been on the two exes since news of the affair broke in March. “But I feel like this season that we just filmed it was trying to figure that out. For me, personally trying to see, you know, do I just stay team Ariana and say f— Tom forever? Do I try and work towards a path of forgiveness for me personally? Do I try to be his friend again? Is that being disloyal to her?”

She continued, “It was this whole inner struggle all season long where I’m like, I have things that I need to work through so I can sleep at night. So I can be a present mother.”

Scheana proceeded to get emotional, fighting back tears, as she opened up about the toll that the cheating scandal has had on her personally.

“It was so hard and I don’t know that Ariana will ever understand how hard this was on me. Yes, it didn’t happen to me — I wasn’t cheated on. But there was a lot that he did do personally to me,” she said of Sandoval. “I’m someone who always tries to work toward a path of forgiveness because that’s just who I am. So it has been such a struggle to try and stay loyal while working on putting myself first.”